Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I stole a fireplace last night.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
