so that wasnt chicken after all
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
