we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
