Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
His hands were made for my vagina.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize