Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
