Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
