I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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