Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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