i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
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