i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
