At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
We are all done wearing pants today
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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