Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
