We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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