I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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