just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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