Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize