I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Operation Purity has been aborted
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize