I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
