haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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