i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
