girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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