lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize