im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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