dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Randomize
