Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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