Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
