youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
