I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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