Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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