You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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