your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
please come you make the beer taste better
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Randomize