im six kinds of drunk right now
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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