you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
