i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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