were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
