Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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