Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Randomize
