Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
