Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
