U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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