i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
