if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
He? As in you personified your dick?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
