Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
