You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Thank you for not boning my boss.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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