I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
