i may or may not be watching the land before time
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize