at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
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