I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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