Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
