We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Floor bacon is actually really good
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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