So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
