I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Randomize