we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I'm getting married
To pizza
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize